Something lacking..

I was chatting with a friend of mine last night on fb, we were sort of catching up with each other about our lives in the past months or year that we haven't talked. Pretty much she's doing okay, as for myself, I am blessed now more than ever. She's been done school for quite some time now, and she's already working (good for her). A little later, she asked me this question: Have you ever felt like there's something lacking in your life as of the moment? That made me think for a good minute,, I thought to myself, well she seems well off with everything that's happening in her life for now (based on what she told me earlier). Then this silly idea came to me, "maybe she's talking about emotional emptiness or something of that sort," since we are in that developmental stage of life where intimacy vs. isolation occurs according to Mr. Erikson. But that isn't the case she said. For now, she's enjoying being single and there's still a lot more for her to accomplish before even committing in a serious romantic relationship (just paraphrasing what she actually said). Being unsure, I ended up asking her what does she mean by such question? She put it this way, "You ever thought like you feel you are meant to do something else greater or better than what you are stuck doing right now?" Ah, now i get it. She honestly feels stagnant as of the moment, having an educational degree and a mediocre paying job at the same time. She desire of attaining more than what she is working for right now. I wouldn't call it being an over-achiever, though she is an achiever by heart. She also shared to me her desire/plan of working abroad just so she could help financially to the construction of their church building as well as financially supporting her family. All these reasons are for a good cause I would say. However, sometimes or most of the time, we don't get things the way we would want to attain them. Yes, we do have the desire or the will to this or that or to plan ahead, but did we ever think that maybe the Lord has a reason why He's letting us go through such situation for the mean time? Probably, a preparation of what's to come? Yes, these may be small things in our eyes, the sufficient paying job that we have right now, but He's making sure that He can trust us with such small things first before He can make us stewards of greater ones. Otherwise, if we become impatient and hurry things up, it will be a big mess to clean after. Just like what happened to me a couple of years ago, I ended up being held back for almost a year after trying to figure things out for myself and going ahead with all my personal plans. Yes, we are destined to do great things for the Lord, so let us make sure that our purpose is not being overshadowed by our selfish plans, anyway everything that we do should all be for the glory of Him alone.

My prayer is that she'll continue to walk in the Lord and all the desires of her heart will come to happen soon, in the Lord's perfect time...

Getting better

Last week has been a tiring one. Worked for 8 days straight, walked back and forth from home to cvs under the heat of the sun. 20 minutes is not that bad though, I consider it more like an exercise. Plus, I get to listen to worship/praise music in my ipod as I'm walking. It's awkward though how those people driving in the road take a weird glance at me while I was walking on the sidewalk with an umbrella. Oh well, it's summer, the most awaited season of the year. There's only a couple of months of intense warmth in a whole year so everyone is trying to enjoy it, while here I am hiding under the shade of my umbrella. My reason is not only that I'm avoiding to get sun burned, but actually (I think) I have this weird skin condition where tiny brown spots develop in my epidermis whenever I am directly exposed to the sun for a long while (Thus, the use of umbrella is so vital for me).

So yeah, I started working at cvs last week. The first day was tough for me, I messed up my register training pretty much. My manager even felt unsure about me working in the pharmacy soon. But in the following days, she saw my improvement. "You were way better now than your first day, you were so nervous then," those are her exact words. Glory to God.. Now that a week has already passed, I'm getting ready to start working at the pharmacy. "You're gonna miss working here up front," that's my manager's way of saying that she'll gonna miss having me at the front store.

3 days ago, I decided not to bring my own food at work. So I ended buying one of those tastycake pie that we sell at the store. It looked/tasted good at the same time. But guess what, I started feeling funny to my stomach a little later after eating it. So i took some tums to relieve my stomach acid issues. But the funny feeling started to get worse, and for a couple of times I threw up while I was in the middle of ringing the register (good thing the garbage can is just beside me). So yeah, I had to excuse myself in front of the paying customers and then puke at the side. Disgusting yeah, but I really can't help myself. And then for the last time, at the very end of the shift when we we're just done closing the store, I literally vomited my guts out just right by the store post outside. I think a couple of people from across the street waiting for the bus to arrive saw that disgusting view of projectile vomit straight on the post/floor, also a man walking his dog witnessed the whole scenario (It's funny how the dog tried to lick my gooey vomit but then its owner just pulled his leash away. LOL). Anyway, my co-worker just decided to give me a ride home. I tried my best not to puke while inside her car while she hurriedly drove until we reach my stop. And I got home safe and sound.

When I got home at around 10:20pm, I was in intense pain. That kind of feeling when you feel like your insides are trying to eat up the rest of its contents, really that's how painful it was. I tried drinking gatorade but still it didn't alleviate the pain, and I just threw it all up anyway. Finally, I decided to get some help from mom or tito because I felt as if my airway it already being blocked by such a great stomach contraction. I went upstairs and started knocking on their door, they were both sound asleep I assumed so I just went straight inside. I tried to wake up my step-dad and he woke up right away. I told him I'm feeling ill and all the rest of the story that happened earlier. He asked me if I wanted to go to the ER, but I'd decided not to 'coz it's not really that serious. But instead, he just prepared me a hot compress to put on my tummy and cooked me some chicken noodle soup with sky flakes crackers on the side. I eventually felt better afterwards and I was able to sleep finally.. Thank God..

2 days later, I saw my mom finally after like 4 days. She told me she hasn't seen me in a while (Again, her way of saying that she misses me, lol), and asked about how I was feeling. I said, I'm feeling better now. She asked, "so what happened?" I said, "I think it the food that I ate was bad or expired," she said, "did you tell the people from the store?" i said, "uhm, I checked the rest of the pie's expiration date and they're not due yet." Then my brothers butted in "you should sue them!" I love how they always resort to that thought when bad things happen to consumers..

So that was pretty much it. I am blessed with my family so much.. And also thankful to the Lord for the new job that He has given me..