Back by not so popular demand

A couple of friends have asked me already, "When are you going to post a new blog entry?" Honestly? I would not be writing anything right now if only i wasn't reminded of this writing portal which at some point, I forgot I had. So, what's been going on with me? Uhm, nothing? Literally, I'm just barely passing each day. No significant events, cool happenings, new realizations -- none of those. What's the word for that Gil? Oh I remember, I"M BORED.

I envy those people I know who are busy as of this time. Anne told me the other day and should I paraphrase "Masarap ang feeling ng busy, alam mo yun? Yung tipong wala ka ng oras para buksan pa yung mga social networking sites mo sa internet. Ganun." How should I know? I have been barren for so long.. Daig ko pa yung osong nagha-hibernate sa kagubatan. I know soon I'm going back to school again and hopefully I'll get myself a decent part-time job (preferably any position in a hospital-setting). Yeah, goodluck to me..

Maybe as of right now I'll just try to write. You know, keep myself busy with this blog and all. I believe my best friend has been waiting for me to write something about my trip in the PI. Not exactly like the one that I wrote earlier. I think she's expecting something that has more depth and substance. Like what naman? I sound as if I learned nothing out of that wonderful trip that I had. I enjoyed it a lot like I said. But really, I feel like I wasn't able to do the very thing that I've been wanting to do.. And that is to really talk to ALL those people that matters to me a lot... Yes, I had a mouthful amount of conversation with some friends, but most of it didn't really satisfy that pre-conceived idea in my head as to what and how our conversations would be like. You get? I didn't even get the chance to meet with ate Anne.. I've been longing to speak with her since I first left for states.. I miss her.. Even those cousins of mine who actually took the time to travel from afar just to see me once again, we didn't have enough time to bond, nor did we have the time to sit down and talk for a while. What a waste..

Then, the other day, I was talking to Tita Be on the phone. I was actually asking her for some money(i'm broke yeah), and the generous heart that she has, of course, she didn't even ask what it's for, she'll give me the money that I need next week. She knows my situation that's why. Anyway, as we were talking, the topic as to how my cousins back in the PI were doing was brought up. I said they're all good. Especially Marivic. She's a hard-working student. Like, really.. I was shocked. She may seem as if she's the brat/fashionista kind of gal based on how she appears to be on the outside, but you'll be surprised. The most down-to-earth person I've ever met... so far. I told tita Be, "She's a good daughter. Malaki ang respeto niya sa papa niya (Tito Boyet).. Alam mo yun.. Hindi niya sinasayang ni singko perang ginagastos ng papa niya sa pag-aaral niya. She understands how education is important to her dad. And she knows he only wants the best for her.." One thing I also admire about her isn't just the fact that she is "smart" academically speaking, but the way she handles things in her own perspective. "Time management and self-discipline lang Ate Bon.. That's how I simply do it.." I remember her (Marivic) saying. Wow... Upon hearing these words, Tita Be suddenly blurted out sarcastically "HAHA! Baligtad ano Bon? Imbes na ikaw ang mag-iimpart ng lesson sa mga nakakabata mong mga pinsan, ikaw pa ang natuturuan nila ngayon..." Shame to myself...

Looking back, I didn't enjoy my flight going back here.. That was the most loneliest place I've ever been in my entire life.. Traveling for more than 20 hours through an airplane, in the midst of people whom I don't even know.. I just tried to sleep as often as I can while I was there, but everytime I open my eyes, I felt like crying.. worst thing is that I can't.. It's like holding my breath within those long hours.. That's how uncomfortable I felt... Wow... I'll never do that again.


Now I feel as if the exact fears that I had before going there already came to pass..