Rotten White Flag

I’m harboring a destructive angst that keeps on growing every single day…

It slowly creeps into my mind, which is manifested through my words and actions..

No matter how hard I try to bury the pain inside, its decay doesn’t really bring any comfort..

Oh, it is going to remain here for a long time.

What am I suppose to do? I can’t face my own battles..

I’m good at ignoring their existence, yes.. Darn… This sucks big time…

I don’t want to stop believing in dreams

Even though the circumstances around me prove me wrong at times.


Yes, I am broken-hearted.. Not that kind of a shallow romance..

I love my dreams.. More so even the thought of them..

But they were taken away from me..

Maybe I don’t know what the future holds,

But life is all about taking risks is it not?

God, I feel like a freaking invalid…

With someone taking me by the wheelchair wherever they would want me to go..

Thinking that they know what’s best for me

But they themselves have their own unsettled personal issues to worry about.


Every single thing that reminds me of those things that I should be looking forward to right now creates a slight ache in my chest every now and then..


I often feel regretful

Since I decided to do what is “right”

Just to show what? Respect?

That moment when I gave up my own choice of doing what I’m really passionate about…

In exchange of what? Nothing..

Self-destruction is what’s ahead…

Oh I wish… if I’m that stupid enough.

But no, I can’t let myself go through that downward spiral..

I know I am better than what she thinks of me..

Maybe far better than what she thinks of herself..